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Stranger Things Cast, Jimmy Fallon Surprise Madame Tussauds Guests
I’ve never been to a wax museum, and I have no intention of doing so at any point in the future under my own free will. Do I want to see a bunch of creepy, uncanny valley versions of celebrities? Do I want to stare into their dead eyes, gaze upon those soulless forms? Do I want to wander a graveyard of wax bodies, to revel in these false idols, to drink in their famous effigies? The answer, dear reader, is no.
So, I would never be one of these unsuspecting tourists who sat down for a photo with the wax Stranger Things kids in Madame Tussauds only to be startled when they began moving and speaking. These people handle the shock elegantly, getting quickly over the initial jump scare then casually fawning over the young actors and Fallon, dressed as Barb (whispers “Justice For Barb”).
Me? I would not handle this so gracefully. Years of having my mind poisoned by pop culture would have conditioned me to defend myself against these sentient wax beasts come to life through some sort of dark witchcraft. Surely, watching these inanimate objects suddenly speaking and moving toward me would trigger some sort of carnal fight or flight response.
But, thankfully, I’ll never put myself in this situation, because, as I said, I’ll never enter the unnatural crypts of a wax museum.
Instead, I’ll just watch Stranger Things, when it returns for a third season on July 4, and pray that none of the TV images come to life in my actual living room.
Matt is the Culture Editor at Esquire where he covers music, movies, books, and TV—with an emphasis on all things Star Wars, Marvel, and Game of Thrones.