What is happening in our world? Who is doing what? what is going on now? These are questions that will be answered. Enjoy.
Stormy Daniels Roseanne Barr Twitter Feud
What an exciting time for global political discourse. For the first time in decades, Kim Jong Un and Moon Jae-in are taking proactive steps to end the Korean War. Women are reconfiguring industries that have oppressed them for years. And Stormy Daniels is on Twitter, clarifying to Roseanne Barr that she doesn’t even do anal scenes. Finally: important answers to important problems.
For those not following Stormy Daniels on Twitter, the entire exchange started yesterday, when Daniels quote-tweeted a now suspended account. Naturally, because humanity is rich with diversity, someone with the display name “Sassy Southern Diva” responded:
Perfect. Then Oscar winner and famed Medium Patricia Arquette chimed in with quite the logic game.
Following this logic -If she doesn’t represent “classy women” I guess that means the President represents classless men? Hmm. Interesting. ..
— Patricia Arquette (@PattyArquette) May 4, 2018
Ah, Patty. Always too smart for the room. But have no fear: Roseanne Barr showed up, ready to get the main show started. Barr, ever the pornography taste-maker, implied at 3:15 a.m. out of no where that Stormy’s trademark is her anal scenes.
she’s known for anal porn scenes.
— Roseanne Barr (@therealroseanne) May 4, 2018
For Roseanne Barr and every sixteen-year-old boy who laughs at the word “anal,” it looked like she had won the battle, but then Stormy Daniels leapt from the sky and dropped this nugget on the Internet.
I don’t even do anal movies, you ignorant twat. That’s like saying you are known for your beautiful rendition of The Star Spangled Banner. https://t.co/azOOZMDGdw
— Stormy Daniels (@StormyDaniels) May 4, 2018
A B+ effort from Stormy Daniels. As another Esquire.com editor pointed out, this kind of implies that Stormy Daniels does do anal scenes, but really poorly and with a belch at the end. But let’s not split hairs here. The real point of the message comes when Daniels replied to another troll, saying, “[Barr] tried using my job as a reason to discredit me. (Consensual) sexual choices does NOT make someone less of a human.”
Louder—for the people in the back, Stormy. No matter, it’s just another in a long line of reasons that if you don’t know the details (be it about government conspiracy theories or Stormy Daniels’ body of work), it’s probably best to keep your hot takes to yourself.